First, What is Shadow Work?
Shadow prompts are questions that explore your “shadow self”—the parts of your mind shaped by fear, shame, or past hurt. These prompts help you confront thoughts and feelings you often push away.
Why does this matter?
- Your shadow self affects how you think and act in relationships.
- Exploring it can help you spot unhealthy patterns.
- You’ll better understand what drives your emotions and reactions.
Psychologists believe that writing things down helps process emotions. Shadow journaling lets you face these emotions safely, leading to healing and growth.
25 Shadow Prompts to Change Your Perspective on Relationships
See your relationships differently:
- What scares me most about being alone?
- How do I react when I feel ignored or rejected?
- When do I feel clingy, and why?
- Do I seek reassurance even when I don’t need it?
- How do I handle silence or space in relationships?
- What am I afraid to ask for in relationships?
- Do I expect others to make me happy?
- How do I act when I feel someone pulling away?
- What do I believe about love?
- How do I respond to conflict in relationships?
- Do I trust people easily, or do I need constant proof?
- What fears come up when my partner doesn’t text back?
- Do I blame myself when things go wrong in relationships?
- What do I need from others that I’m afraid to admit?
- How do I feel when others set boundaries with me?
- What patterns do I repeat in relationships?
- When do I feel safe in relationships?
- How do I define “too much” in relationships?
- Do I feel secure when I’m by myself?
- How do I respond to my own needs?
- What do I believe about my worth in relationships?
- How do I handle disappointment from others?
- What do I think about people who are emotionally unavailable?
- When do I stop trusting someone?
- How do I show love, and does it come from a place of fear?
25 Shadow Prompts to Dig Deeper Into Your Attachment Style
These prompts go deeper into your anxious attachment patterns:
- What childhood experiences shaped my view of love?
- When did I first feel I wasn’t enough?
- How do I try to “earn” love?
- What does rejection mean to me?
- How do I define abandonment?
- How do I respond when someone cancels plans?
- What role does shame play in my relationships?
- When do I feel unlovable?
- How did my parents or caregivers respond to my emotions?
- What patterns do I see in my past relationships?
- Do I fear losing people, or do I fear being alone?
- What do I need to feel safe in relationships?
- How do I act when I feel disconnected from someone?
- What do I fear most about asking for help?
- Do I believe I deserve healthy love?
- What do I need to forgive myself for?
- How do I react when someone sets a boundary with me?
- What beliefs about love hold me back?
- How do I self-sabotage in relationships?
- When do I feel most secure in myself?
- How do I soothe myself when I’m upset?
- What do I think about the idea of unconditional love?
- How do I respond to emotional intimacy?
- What do I fear most about being vulnerable?
- What does a healthy relationship look like to me?
Best to Use Attached App With These Shadow Prompts
To level-up your shadow prompts, the Attached app has an intelligent AI journal that analyzes your journal entries.
- Personalized prompts: as you journal, Attached will help you dive deeper than you've never had by continuing to suggest journal prompts.
- Intelligent analysis: after journaling, Attached is the world's first intelligent journal that analyzes entries with CBT, helping you gain control of your negative thoughts and override with a realistic view.
- Eden (your relationship coach) remembers: the more you journal, the more Eden can make suggestions based on your entries.
Daily Journaling Is the Daily Workout You Need For Your Mind
Here’s why it works:
- Writing helps you process emotions and thoughts.
- You gain clarity about your patterns and behaviors.
- It builds self-awareness, which leads to healthier choices.
- Small daily reflections add up to big changes over time.
Start Your Journey Today
Shadow journaling may feel uncomfortable at first, but it’s a powerful tool for growth. Each prompt helps you peel back layers of fear and uncover the strength underneath. With practice, you’ll start seeing relationships—and yourself—through a healthier, more secure lens.
Here’s to a year of reflection, healing, and connection!